Have you ever noticed how refreshingly fun it is to be around positive thinking people who seem to naturally maintain a positive attitude? No matter how bad the circumstances, negativity never even enters their minds, let alone crosses their lips to form negative, faithless words! But let’s be honest, encountering a positive person is a rare occurrence these days. Whoops, that sure was a negative thought!
Negative thoughts come to our minds every day. They usually appear when we are unsure of a situation or are worried about the future. Not surprisingly we tend to automatically think negatively in many areas of our lives, rather than positively. Even worse, we unconsciously create and recreate our beliefs and states of mind based upon the reality facts presented to us each day.
You may wondering, that given all these, how can you get rid of negative thoughts? You can eliminate negative thoughts from your mind. In time, you will be able to create a habit of thinking positively.
Just imagine waking up one day and looking out the window and seeing rain. It’s possible that a thought might come into your head that says “what a dreadful day”. Now, is it true that the day is dreadful? No, of course not, it is simply raining. However if you believe the thought “what a dreadful day”, in other words if you are stuck then guess what you will probably have? That’s right, you will probably have a dreadful day!
In other words if you believe a thought like that, it can
generate what we might call negativity.
It’s completely normal to have negative thoughts! It’s part of our evolutionary history. There is nothing wrong with you. We all have minds that have evolved to be constantly on the lookout for problems and dangers, so most of us have minds prone to have many negative thoughts.
The problem is not that we have negative
thoughts. The problem comes when we believe
our thoughts are true.
When you are no longer entangled in thoughts they lose their grip on you and lose their power to generate unpleasant emotions.
Negative thoughts have several
characteristics. They are:
- Automatic: They just pop into your head without any effort on your part;
- Distorted: They do not fit all of the facts;
- Unhelpful: They keep you depressed, make it difficult to change, and stop you from getting what you want out of life;
- Plausible: You accept them as facts, and it does not occur to you to question them;
- Involuntary: You do not choose to have them, and they can be very difficult to switch off.
Thoughts like these can trap you in a vicious circle. The more depressed you become, the more negative thoughts you have, and the more you believe them. The more negative thoughts you have, and the more you believe them, the more depressed you become. The main goal of cognitive therapy is to help you to break out of this vicious circle.
Habitual negative thinking can begin as a result of feeling
that your life is out of control.
That pattern of negative thinking can make it harder for us to regain control of our lives. But, you can stop negative thinking and take control with the help of these few tips:
Positive Thinking for a Positive
Attitude: 8 Powerful Tips
Focus on what you’re thinking about.
Our negative actions and words are coming from our negative thoughts. Our body, including the mouth, has no choice but to follow wherever our mind goes. It is possible to control your thoughts, regardless of what you’ve been led to believe. As soon as a negative thought comes into your mind, purposefully make it a point to replace it with a positive one. At first, this may take some time, because chances are, we will probably have a lot more negative thoughts in our head than positive ones. But eventually, the ratio will reverse itself.
Give yourself space to feel your
emotions without judgment.
When you feel a strong negative emotion arise, instead of getting lost in circling negative thoughts which feed the feeling and make it more intense, try to observe the feeling as it rises in your body. Where can you feel it? What does it feel like? By observing your feelings, you create a distance between your true self and your current emotional state. This can help you to remember that your true identity is something separate from, and greater than, any transient negative thoughts and feelings. As you continue to observe them the feeling rather than getting caught up over-analyzing it in your mind, it will start to fade away.
Stop letting other people’s negative
attitudes influence yours.
This may mean we need to stop hanging around with people who do nothing but spout negative stuff. We can’t afford to do this when our goal is to become more positive. The negative people in our life aren’t going to like it when we stop participating in negativity. Just remember that birds of a feather really do flock together. So, spend more time with friends and family – as long as they are positive people. Avoid negative people – whether they are family or not. Be around positive people.
Try to withhold negative judgments of
yourself and others.
Look for the best in yourself and others.
Take some time to write strong,
life-giving, positive affirmation statements.
Make a commitment to read those statements out loud every day. Enjoy how great they make you feel. Know in your heart that you’re making progress, even if you can’t see it just yet. Just keep affirming the positive.
You can always visualize things
differently.
If you can imagine bad and even worst things, then you can just as well imagine good and even extraordinary ones. Your mind is your most powerful tool; use it in a way that can help you to the fullest. Whenever you notice your mind slipping into negative thoughts again, bring it back to the beautiful and positive visualization you just created. Enjoy rewinding your best scenario in your mind, as seeing a great movie every time.
Learn to Detach from Thoughts.
Thoughts play a very significant role in determining our state of mind. If we pursue negative thoughts then we give them greater power and influence over our state of being. However, it is possible to decide which thoughts to allow and which to reject. We have to learn to be vigilant and prevent negative thoughts from taking hold. As soon as we become aware of negative thoughts we should let go of them. We can imagine that we are throwing them out of our mind into a cosmic dustbin.
Have Low Expectations.
Depression often occurs because our desires remain unfulfilled. The more desires we have, the more likely we are to be disappointed. After disappointment comes a sense of frustration and depression. If we minimise our desires then we will not be prone to disappointment. This does not mean we cannot strive for excellence and achieve things. We definitely should strive to achieve various accomplishments. However, we should try to have an attitude of detachment to the outcome. Nor should we expect people to behave in a certain way.
The best way to eliminate the negative thoughts is to try different techniques and stick to the technique that works best for you, and use it whenever you need to.
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